‘Drive Carrboro’ group gets rolling

Tired of poking through neighborhoods and creeping over speed tables in your SUV?

If a new Carrboro association has any say about it, you may soon be pressing just a bit harder on the old accelerator.

The Carrboro Automotive Service Association (CASA) announced Wednesday (April 1) its new initiative aimed at promoting increased automobile use in Carrboro. They’re calling the promotion “Drive Carrboro.”

CASA spokesperson Shirley U. Guest explains the promotion, saying “In these tough economic conditions, getting folks quickly and easily from their homes to shops becomes very important. While we think walking and biking are good for you, they just don’t do as much to stimulate the local economy as the good old auto.”
Guest added, “We’re going to propose that the town raise speed limits in residential areas and eliminate most speed tables. These things just don’t work anyway.”

When asked about the increased pollution likely to be caused by more automobile use, Guest said, “CASA feels strongly that there’s already so much hot air in Carrboro that no one’s going to notice a little more.”
Other advocacy items looming large in CASA’s windscreen are the elimination of crosswalks and the four-laning of Greensboro Street/Hillsborough Road.

“All we have to do is eliminate the bike lanes, and widening those streets becomes very feasible,” Guess said. “Then we could raise the speed limit to 45 or 50 and we’d really be rolling.”

Guest points skeptics to Cary as a town that really honors the automobile and its important place in our economy.

“The faster Mom can get the kids to soccer practice, the more time she’s got to spend shopping,” Guest said. “Cary,” she added, “gets it.”
So you might want to take an extra look before you step off that curb. CASA’s coming.
– Staff reports